A glimpse of me...

I know that I need to post a picture of me where Im not super dolled up...but I still haven't been able to scan one or get my P.O.S. camera to work...so this will have to continue to suffice for right now.

Actually I have a couple other pics of myself on the computer but they are both track pictures and we all know how sports action pictures turn out. I guess eventually Ill post those and see how funny the comments are. But until then the winter semi-formal will do...

Sleepless In Ohio...

I make a call
but no one to help on the other end,
Another sleepless night
Endless thoughts, my mind wanders
I get to a place of reflection, an epiphany of sorts.
Next thing I know I start to crave...

The image of a red-headed, blond stranger from far away
is vividly emblazon in my mind

I crave attention, affection, passionate, sultrty love making
But sex will do...

To be wanted, yearned for, adored, loved...
I need to be touched, to be felt in an intimate way.
My body screams for it, I become hyper sensitive to the touch
Unwatched, alone, and in the dark...
I pull the covers up, turn the music on, and roll towards the wall

My moans are quiet and muffled by my pillow
but my insides scream loudly.
Moisture flows freely...warm slippery sin
Do I dare touch again?

My body screams yes while my sense of logic tells me no...
"go to sleep, you gotta get up in the morning"

FUCK THAT!!!
more like fuck me
my fingers continue walking till I fall asleep.

Wake Up Call (Bastards!!!)

I was soooooo pissed this morning...

Sleepin good then low and behold tha loud digging began. The main water line in the front had busted or whatever so they were out fixin it wit all the bulldozers etc...yea that was about 7 this morning...interrupting my beauty sleep....

Then later that day my sorta moms (I live wit one of my bestfriends) comes home and is pissed...they dug up all her plants and bushes in the front yard that she had been workin like 6 years to grow...aint that bouta bit#h???

Anyway today was jus a so chill day, watched the "Breakfast Club" and jus chilled. It was rainin, I was sore from training so not much else to do...I'll holla

My First

Welp...

I guess the best way to start is to just do it, ya kno. But where to start...thats the real question. Im Crystal for anyone who wants to kno (or even really cares for that matter). I figure journaling is all good, so why not make it avaliable to the public. Today has been the most up and down day. Where you get good news...always comes bad. No real way to express what Im feelin so I'll jus layout the situation. A couple of months ago my mom had a small heart attack and stroke. The doctors told us that surgery would be necessary, but they couldn't do it at that time due to the amount of swelling and blood in her brain. Here it is a couple of months later and they've been conducting tests to decide if now is the time.
Well, yesterday we went and had an MRI done. She got a call today saying that they think that it might be worse than a stroke or heart attack. The doctors have reason to believe that its brain cancer!!! How can this be??? Why my mom? Why now...she's only 42!!!
Right now I seriously dont kno how to feel. Im really in shock...Seems like one bad thing after another in my life. I dont even have the strenghth to dictate every thing else thats happened in the last few months...guess Ill save it for another rainy day.